Welcome back to my review of 2023! Last time, I reviewed everything I read last year; now, I’ll review the movies I watched last year.
Spoiler Warning: Stop now while you’re ahead if you don’t want spoilers to any piece of media I’m about to mention. You have been warned.
Movies:
We move on to the category of movies I saw this year.
Above, you see the poster for the 2023 masterpiece, Sound of Freedom, which I do not own.
I think I saw about 20 movies in total this year, give or take, and I’ll rank them as follows.
1st Place: Sound of Freedom
2nd Place: A Million Miles Away
3rd Place: Shazam: Fury of The Gods
4th Place: Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
5th Place: Spiderman: Across The Spiderverse
6th Place: The Super Mario Bros. Movie
7th Place: Mission Impossible-Dead Reckoning: Part One
8th Place: Transformers: Rise of The Beasts
9th Place: Gran Turismo
10th Place: John Wick: Chapter 4
11th Place: Family Switch
12th Place: Hypnotic
13th Place: Five Nights at Freddy's
14th Place: Barbie
15th Place: Plane
16th Place: Blue Beetle
17th Place: No One Will Save You
18th Place: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3
19th Place: My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3
20th Place: Your Place or Mine
21st Place: Fast X
Below, I left a link to Angel Studios’ website so that you may Pay It Forward, as they say, and support Sound of Freedom by giving someone the opportunity to watch the movie and realize the dark reality of the horrendous child-trafficking world. Please help spread the message!
Anyway, back to the show!
Sound of Freedom is in 1st place because of its beautiful message of stopping child trafficking, one child at a time. I think Jim Caviezel played Tim Ballard perfectly. No other man could’ve pulled it off, and no other children could’ve portrayed Rocío and Miguel Aguilar. Kudos to Cristal Aparicio and Lucás Ávila for their amazing performances. It’s safe to say I really do regret not watching this movie at the theater.
A Million Miles Away resonates with me specifically because I am the daughter of Nicaraguan immigrants and this story is based on the true story of José M. Hernandez, a Mexican-American immigrant who always dreamt about the stars and hopefully one day becoming an astronaut. We have a scene in the movie where, one day at school, José’s teacher sees his drawing of a rocket ship1 and takes it to hopefully give it back to him when he achieves his dream… Thank God she did. She was able to give it to him just as he was going to board the rocket ship. She was older now and I teared up watching this scene. I watched the movie with only my Mom at home.
Shazam: Fury of The Gods had a surprisingly nice message about family and learning that the people who really love you will never let you go, leave, or forget you. I say this because throughout the movie, we see Billy get anxious and annoyed at his siblings doing less and less activities together. Billy is also scared that his parents will kick him out because he is almost 18, meaning he’ll be out of the foster system. His foster Mom, Rosa, is still a little bothered that Billy doesn’t refer to her as “Mom”, but instead her name. Victor tells her Billy will come around. And at the end we see a heartwarming scene where Rosa reassures Billy that he will always have a home with her, Victor, and his siblings. I teared up in my seat at the theater. I remember me and my family were watching this with friends of the family.
The message of Dungeons and Dragons, in my opinion, is that family doesn’t always mean being related by blood, which has always been one of my strongest opinions. In a certain scene, we see Edgin say sorry to Kira for not focusing on her like he should’ve because he wasn’t trying to bring her Mom back to life, but his wife. Of course this ended up not being Kira but Sofina, who shape-shifted to look like Kira, but that’s besides the point. Near the end, Holga dies but is brought back to life by Edgin, who used the Tablet of Reawakening on her. He realizes at the end that Holga will always be her real mom because she was the one who raised Kira.
Lord, Spiderman: Across The Spiderverse was a wild ride… I liked watching this movie for the experience of being in a theater and being surprised by cameos like Insomniac Spiderman, MCU Prowler, Spectacular Spiderman (which my older brother actually grew up watching), and stuff like that. But when it comes to the story, I didn’t really like that the movie doesn’t know how to divide between two antagonists, Miguel O’Hara and Spot. At the beginning, we see Spot introduced as the main villain, then for the largest chunks of the movie, Miguel is the largest foil for Miles, then near the end the movie remembers Spot and puts him back in the movie. Now that’s not to say this was a bad film, I’m actually excited for the third movie featuring Miles as Spiderman, which hopefully releases soon. But I would prefer Miguel as the main villain in that one, instead of Spot.
I wanted to take a break to refer you to God. Maybe you’d like to consider reading the Bible or praying, it doesn’t take long, just 1-to-2 minutes or more if you’d like.
“God, I ask that you Bless me and my family, and all of my friends. And I pray that you Bless everyone and anyone in need. Anyone going through stuff, please send them a sign that they’ll get through it. Please let them know you’re always there to comfort them. In The Name Of Jesus Christ, Amen.”
That’s just a quick prayer you can say right now or tonight to start your relationship with God, or get it back on track. Thank you for praying with me.
The Super Mario Bros. Movie was a fun watch, it had its moments of comedy, but in terms of story, unfortunately, there’s not much the source material can give us. The games have mostly the same plot except for a few Mario games, and even then, sadly that plot doesn’t translate well to the screen. But even so, it did what it could. Kudos to Anya Taylor-Joy for surprising me with her voice-acting skills, and well, Chris Pratt wasn’t bad as Mario either because I think of Mario as having a similar voice to his in my head. The rest of the cast was fine in my opinion, neither amazing nor horrible, just right. They hit that sweet spot, I think.
Mission Impossible-Dead Reckoning: Part One was a movie that I came in blind to when I sat down in my seat at the theater; I didn’t know what to expect. It was good because the twist, I believe, was that the “Entity” controlled itself or whatever2 and it was erasing the main villain guy from all CCTV footage, records, and such, therefore making him like a ghost and shielding him from being traced by the main characters.
So with Transformers: Rise of The Beasts… I did not like Anthony Ramos as the main lead… I’m sorry. Were there times that I could swallow his being on the screen? Yes. Did his being in the film impede my judgment of the movie as I’m reviewing it now? No. Not at all. It’s not that bad. I’m not gonna let any, and I mean, ANY, biasness whatsoever impede that process. So. You know obviously, I was rootin’ for my man Optimus off the bat, cus who wouldn’t? And I was very much so pleasantly surprised by Pete Davidson’s voice-acting skills and portrayal of Mirage which ended up being one of my FAVORITE characters in the movie and in the entire Transformers universe in general. I have now given him my coveted third spot in my list of favorite Transformers, preceded by Optimus Prime himself and Bumblebee, succeeded by Wheeljack. And speaking of which, I really liked Wheeljack. I thought he was one of the cuter characters like Arcee, the latter being a Transformer I’ve always loved. Also, I really enjoyed watching Optimus Primal and Airazor, especially when they interacted. They were like an autobot couple. The main villain, Scourge, was especially scary to me because he looked like a menacing version of the big brother-figure Optimus has become in my mind, I loved hating him when I saw him in the theater with my family. Another surprise I got was when we came home from the theater and my brother told me Liza Koshy was the actress behind Arcee, I did not expect her to be a pretty decent voice actress. I couldn’t tell it was her at all. Good job.
Gran Turismo was, at its core, a beautiful story about a father finally accepting his son’s career of choice3 , and I liked David Harbour’s character’s arc because he didn’t want Jann to end up like him, never knowing how great he could’ve been. And trust me, by taking one look at him, I can tell he probably would’ve been a great Racer. The movie had a happy ending as Jann completed the French track named 24 Hours of Les Mans, which is a twenty-four-hour race, as the name implies. He alternated with his old rival and another guy in his class from back at the academy. The three would take turns racing for a few hours each at a time. Overall, I regret not being able to watch this movie at the theater.
WE HAVE ARRIVED AT JOHN WICK: CHAPTER 4… I liked this movie, even though I’ve never seen the second one, I’ve only the third one in parts, and the only installment of the series I’ve seen completely (other than this one) is the first one. Keanu Reeves gets the job done in this one4 because he’s the only guy I picture in this role. I like the addition of Rina Sawayama, especially because in the end credits they play a song she made for this movie5; listen below.
Family Switch is one of those Christmas movies that doesn’t feel like a Christmas movie, and I liked that about it. It’s about a family that is stressed out by their own individual lives so they wish to switch lives with each other. I cried when the Mom and Daughter realized just how much they actually do for each other. The Mom realizes her Daughter actually is trying her best to get better grades in school when she talks with her Daughter’s math teacher in her Daughter’s body. And the Daughter realizes her Mom’s immense sacrifices at work and in general just to give her Daughter a chance at being a star Footballer6. I liked it while it lasted, it was a good watch for Christmas that can surprisingly be seen during the year as well. Not many Christmas movies can say that about themselves, so good job Netflix.
Hypnotic was trippy AF. But that’s what I liked about it. The MC (played by Ben Affleck) thought he was looking for the guy who kidnapped his daughter but actually, he was the one making fake memories for him to wake up from the fake reality that the villain made7 to keep him docile so that he wouldn’t find his daughter. The “Hypnotist” woman was actually his wife and she was trying to hide their daughter from him because she wanted to train her (with the help of the villain) because the MC had found a file on a computer that talked about a “Project Domino”, but the “project” was actually their daughter, Minnie. Ben Affleck’s and Alice Braga’s characters were two of the most powerful hypnotists, so their daughter was at a natural advantage. It is definitely safe to say that I loved all the twists the movie set up, well done!
Five Nights at Freddy’s is one of those movies that I enjoyed watching while I did, but in the end, I wouldn’t watch again… Not because the movie was horrible, but because of my own convictions. You see, I thought nothing of the movie when we finished watching it at home, late at night. But when my oldest brother, Jr, told our Dad that fights had broken out across theaters in America after people watched the movie, I knew something was off. Maybe that’s just me being Abby, but I’m still wary of watching this movie again, especially at home. I’m just scared of its bad spiritual influences.
I didn’t love Barbie, but the message is nice. I just wish Ryan Gosling wasn’t like forty8… Margot Robbie, on the other hand, was perfect for Barbie because she looks exactly like the doll. Also, I’ll add a link to Dance The Night by Dua Lipa9.
Plane was… An odd watch… What I mean is that I thought of it as like a low-budget movie, but then in the middle of watching it at home with my family, I was like… Okay, this is surprisingly not bad. It’s about this guy who is a pilot and he’s flying these people from Singapore to Honolulu, but there’s turbulence, so they crash land in The Philippines, only to find out that where they are is the turf of these gang guys, I think. Just, just watch it, you’ll like it…
Blue Beetle… Did I think it was a fun watch? Yes. Did I think it was amazing? No. Would I watch it again? Sure. Hotel? Trivago. Nah, I’m just kiddin’. But I did think some moments paid too much attention to the whole family, and not enough on Jaime. Like for example, some fight scenes don’t let us appreciate the main hero and instead show off gadgets the other family members found. Like, maybe this should’ve been an Avengers-type movie, featuring a group of heroes instead of just one. I mean I like that the director got to show off Hispanic culture because we are very family-oriented, but still. The whole family isn’t the main character, Jaime is.
For a Hulu movie, the special effects featured in No One Will Save You are pretty good. I didn’t like how the movie ended, but I will say that the scary sequences in the house and in the scene where she runs away from the tall alien were better than I expected.
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 was a messy movie with a lot of sequences that I couldn’t really get through, and it was not the send-off we deserved, but the villain was surprisingly better than I thought. He was not the greatest villain, but better than whatever crap we’ve gotten in the last few years. I also liked Rocket’s arc. I thought it was really sad and I felt bad for the animal friends he had made as a kid. I sort of liked the end because we got a sad but understandable send-off to these characters, but I didn’t like that Gamora wasn’t our Gamora, she was the Gamora from the past. We started this series with Come and Get Your Love by Redbone, and that’s how we finished it. Listen here10.
My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 was a movie I watched with my Mom and Dad that ended up being one of those movies that I wish I hadn’t wasted 2+ hours on11. THE ONLY THING I LIKED ABOUT THIS MOVIE WAS THE SONG… Listen below, it’s called Ginete by Pantelis Pantelidis.
Your Place or Mine was super boring12… The movie was about a man and a woman who are best friends, but slowly, they fall in love. It was your average rom-com, but it was a little more boring than I thought.
LASTLY. We got Fast X. I didn’t like it at all. Dom’s brother died for nothing13. I mean, I didn’t even like him anyway, but that’s not the point. Jason Momoa (that pedophiliac, rapey fuck)14 was annoying. The others were just… There. Safe to say I hated this movie.
Anyway, thanks for reading this time around, and I’ll be back with Part 3 soon!15
And as The Song of The Day, I pick
I’m not sure if it’s a rocketship though. Keep that in mind.
This part’s a little blurry because the movie was released in July and now it’s January, so it’s been a long time.
No, he’s not a stripper!
He’s not really that good at acting, especially because, in this series, his lines consist of a rotation of “Yeah”, “Guns”, and “No”, every thirty minutes. Sorry, Keanu…
I do not own this song, pLeAsE nO sUe…
YES, I CALL “SOCCER” FOOTBALL. YES, I AM AMERICAN. GET USED TO IT. IT’S A HABIT FROM CALLING THE GAME FUTBOL IN SPANISH. FOOTBALL IS THE PROPER NAME FOR “SOCCER”.
I think, not sure, it’s blurry.
Sorry, RG.
Again, no sue please, I don’t own this song.
For the last time, I don’t own this song.
There was literally a nude beach scene where I had to avert my eyes. Mind you, the scene doesn’t add anything to the plot.
Sorry Reese Witherspoon.
He veered off the road I think, and the scene didn’t even call for that… Okay.
No, I’m not sorry.
I forgot to mention Leave The World Behind. It was boring AF and I did not appreciate Archie jacking off to photos of Ruth. The message was something I understood, but the movie could’ve been less boring.